Being with him makes the life meaningful, is that bullshit?

The fact is the life looks meaningless being without him.It actually past months ago, I am still deep in it.
I know I should not, and I just can not help it. that is why I wish a strong will inside me. people are born with diversified personalities, I just happened to have a very weak will,a very sentimental character,and very negative personality. I never wish a good luck in my future, I know I am doomed to have none.

Only time can cure, so I prefer I get older faster too reach the stage of attitude you currently have.